Doctor, doctor! What's the matter?

Welcome to the second edition of "What if a Small Thing Changed?" This is the weekly segment that asks the question, 'what if a small thing changed?' By asking the question, 'what if a small thing changed?', we will find out what disastrous or non-consequential things may occur with the changing of a small and simple thing. If you have not followed so far, I would suggest you do something suited to your stupidity; like skipping.

For this edition, subsequent to the blog's genesis, we must look to our sick days from school and work. Natalie has suggested that, this day, we should discuss Dr. Phil (or, as she incorrectly spelt, Dr. Phill. Marks lost for that Natalie, but points for such an exquisite topic!). Now, we all know that the marvellous Dr. Phil is a mastermind of the human mind. He knows our thoughts, thinks of our knowledge, and saves us from ourselves.

But what if a small thing changed? What if, one day, the doctor got stumped?! In all my wisdom and knowledge, I hold the horrifying answers. Do you want to the answers? Do you? DO YOU?!?! Then, read on...

The first, and most crucial factor, is that the audience would not applause! The doctor would see this, and try to create information and diagnose from the top of his shiny head. The audience would know this is wrong and would start booing. Immediately, CBS would cancel the entire series. This would force Oprah to go broke for reasons you readers cannot fathom. Also, the audience would begin to riot and Los Angeles would fall into chaos yet again.

As the years go on, more and more people would begin to riot. Hollywood would lose all the power it holds and no more Hollywood movies (they stopped being films years ago) would be made. All actors (I use the term loosely) from Hollywood would try their hand at stage acting in New York. The sudden influx of people on the Eastern seaboard would flip the North American continent over and a tidal wave would ride the Atlantic Ocean before decimating western Africa. This will lead to people becoming frog-human hybrids under North America, and in 12 years, India will take over the world using Bollywood as the driving force.

I dread to see the day when India rules the world. So Phillip, for all our sake, keep thinking our thoughts!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

If you would like to pick the 'small thing' in question for next weeks edition of "What if a Small Thing Changed?", leave your feedback by clicking the link which can be found in a general that way <---> direction.